A friend asked, " Why you always laugh when people said that you're an emo girl? "
I said, " That's a very good question. Hmm...I think I got split personality?"
Anyway, I once thought that as long as I didn't see a person I liked for some time, my feelings would fade...
But this time, I had to prove myself wrong...
No, it was totally wrong..
This time, I felt much deeper for that person...Although I've never see him for almost 2 weeks+...
It's almost the 3rd week...And I kept thinking about him. And his images kept appearing on my head. I realized that even though I haven't met him for a long time, I liked him even more...This totally contrast to what I thought...What should I do?
I really can't find the answer. I felt suffer, I have a so-called good news yesterday, and the moment I heard it from mum, the first person in mind that I wanted to talk to is HIM. But in the end, after a second thought, I didn't tell him...After all, it might not be a really news that actually make me happy. It actually made me more stressed, but I just want him to know, so that when I'm unhappy about my studies, I can turn to him and he can cheer me up...
But who am I to him? I asked myself...After asking myself this question, I realized, I am NOTHING to him. He might not even know my feelings for him...After all, it's me who doesn't him to know it...Cause I'm afraid that letting him know, I would lose him...That's why I prefer to hide it from him...
I knew I liked him...But even myself don't dare to go near him when I see him...I hate myself because I can't do anything...And what I can only do is to act if I don't even care...But in the end, hurting myself...But it's okay...I'd rather being the one feeling hurt...Just that I would think that the only thing I can do is, to wish that the girl he was chasing after will be with him and they'd be happy together...
My friend said that I'm silly for not telling him...And gave up even before I tried...But, I guessed I've already knew his answer d...I remembered he said that he doesn't like girls that is not tough...And being a tough girl, it's not really easy...remember I said that I wanted to be like Xia Mo who is really a tough and cool girl? But still, I failed...Of course, I never cry in front of people la...But that also doesn't mean I'm tough when I always cry myself alone...
People who knew me knows that I'm easily shattered although I looked like I'm tough in front of them by being happy-go-lucky most of the time...But, to be the truth, I'm not tough at all...:C
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