[Engsub] Will you marry me ? ft DAS & Peter Ho

A Night in a Club

Yesterday was the first time I went to clubbing in a disco...Initially I was like a stick at there. Not moving at all while others are moving their head and bodies...Shaking here and there...Samuel asked me to move a bit. But I was just so still at there. LOL. Can't help laughing at myself that time...Even my boss said that we have to let go of our thoughts when we are here...I just smiled and drink the mix (it's a mix of Martell and tea? or coke and so on...)Then, most of them went into the toilet to "merlion" (a phrase to indicate vomiting)...Yonggie (my gay friend) came up to me...He said that I should let go of myself and try not to control myself...Drink till I drunk but not to the extent that I am not conscious...He then persuade me to drink...I understand his kindness, he just want me to enjoy myself when I'm in such place cause if I am controlling myself, there's no point for me being here...He gave me a glass of concentrated Martell mix and ask me to bottoms up...which I actually did...He did say before that he will take care of me, and if any of them (the guys) raped me, he will rape them back...LOL! And somehow, after I drank, I totally kinda lost control of myself...but I was still conscious. If not, I won't be able to write anything here. Then, we are dancing like crazy at there...Somehow, I find it funny that Amy kept dancing with Alvin...IT WAS SOOOOO FUNNNNYYY~~~!!! Amy was really pretty ...I think she is...We are quite close although we just knew each other for 2 days working at Expo...LOL...And also Cecilia..Another New York skin solution promoter...just knew her yesterday...It was damn fun yesterday night...I felt so high that ...uh..can't explain...But it's really a memorable night yesterday...I danced with Yonggie most often...If people doesn't know that he's a gay, they might think we're couple...And also, Samuel is also quite nice to me. Although he always says that he likes me and wants to marry me, (he's a young kid la...20 years old...) and told me that he's a "se lang", but yesterday proves that he's not. He never take advantage of me when I'm quite drunk. He made me wear my jacket properly cause that jacket that I wore is the smooth type and it drops off easily...Each time my jacket came off, he will pull it up and make sure that I covered myself. He was really caring towards me, I can feel that. But I guessed that's not love. Then, there was once I was drunk but conscious and I realised someone opened my handbag, so I wanna go and take my handbag and check. Sherry accidentally hitted my left eye. I felt really pain that I hardly can open my eyes. Yes, after that hit, I already gain full consciousness and I'm no longer drunk or high. LOL. Samuel saw me alone at the chair and asked me if I'm okay. I told him that Sherry hitted my eye. Samuel took my hand and brought me outside. This is the only time that I felt that he's like a man. If not, all the time he's acting like a kid to me. He then lead me to sit on the sofa and asked if I need an ice. I told him is okay. I kept rubbing my eye but it still doesn't really help. Samuel saw my behaviour and hold my hands when I tried to rub my eye. It's really long but my left eye still felt very pain and I'm really scared that I started to break down. Sam noticed I cried and used his hands to wipe away my tears. (weird, I thought I would fall for him le...Cause it's like those in Taiwanese or Korean dramas scenes...and I thought I would fell for a guy who did that to me but ...I never fell for him..) Then he hugged me and put my head on his shoulder. First time ever a guy did that to me but yet, I never fall for him...Uhm...I never knew why...Although I've always said that I will fall for such guys...But to say the least, yesterday night was really awesome. And I really felt contented. :)

p/s: edited. Okay. I lied. I realized the day after that I had some feelings for him. And I don't know why. And I realized Sherry was kind to me. She apologized for hitting me. And I'm really sorry for making her feeling guilty...

Melting Heart

Listening to the piano version of Peter Ho's "Remember Loved", my heart started to melt....I don't know how to describe this special feeling...Perhaps it may be due to this song being used as the background music during those sad scenes...But, personally, this song gave me a special soothing feeling, but at the same time, the loneliness in the heart...Just as what's being partly portrayed by this song...The fear and so on...I loved this song a lot though it's a rather sad song...Mixed feelings when I listened to it...

Another song that also melted my heart is the piano version of Peter Ho's "Masked Face"...Gosh. I damn like it...Each time I listened to these 2, my heart melted that my mind flows with the rhythm of the music...It's so calming despite the sadness in the song...I guessed that I'm the type that knows how to guess the feelings in a song...I used to listen to songs being played instrumentally and I'd try to relate how it is best to put in what type of situation or scenes. I can feel the sadness in some songs...Although there are some songs that appeared to be "happy" type, sometimes you'd just be able to feel there's sadness in it...Just like Susan Barth's "Wonderland"...Though the song being sung doesn't sound like it's a sad song (in fact the way it's sung is like the "happy" type), you can feel the sadness in it...Okay, perhaps maybe I'm only good at relating sadness and emo stuff la...That's why some people nicknamed me as "Emo Girl"...

Sigh...If only...If only...Nevermind. People says that I forever emo. Maybe because I've never tasted happiness before. That's why I'm emo-ing almost everyday and night. That's also why I'd prefer to make me work for long hours so that I don't have time to emo...But sometimes in work there's stress...I can't expect much from life. I am learning not to trust people too easily (I guessed I always said this but never at all I manage to do this...:(  ) The fear of betrayals...The fear of being not able to fit in the society...The fear of everything...I'm phobic...to almost everything...There's nothing that I'm not fear about...perhaps except dogs. Since to me, dogs are my only best friend...As in the most loyal ones...They don't tell out your secrets...They can sense your mood...They are capable to carry away your sorrowness...They know your feelings...They make you happy when you're sad...Dogs make me smile...Sometimes when I emo-ed, I really wished I had a "doctor" by my side to make me happy...But, I'm not allowed to have a pet in the hostel...T___T    I want to be pampered...I want to be loved...But...nevermind, why don't I just forget bout all these ? Cause...these things would never happened on me...Call me negative. Yes, I'm not afraid that I'm negative about my life...How to be positive when I've tried to be one, but what I've got is just a disappointment after all???

Seeing how good their relationships are...to say the least, I'm a lil jealous. Initially, the 5 of us has good relationship before we came to NUS...We talked so much things together on FB...But things changed after the 5 of us came to NUS. A seems that she doesn't like me. But we did talked. Not much though. Then, T, K, J and me has good relationships that even MSL people thought we are inseparable...But after we're separated into our respective groups, things started to change, slightly.

But now, when I see the 4 of them having good outings together on each other's FB wall, I hope that I can be in it too. Well, the separation caused is not the factor actually. So, no worries. I just don't know why. But nevermind. I'm lazy to seek for the answers. It's as if there's no need to find for the answers too.

There is someone who seems to care about me. She kept asking about me. But sometimes, maybe the problem did lies in me. I really don't know if someone really genuinely cares for me or what she wanted to know is my results? You know, people like to care about you only at this period (only right after exam results are released). Is it that I think too much? But why she finds and care about me only after the exam results are released? There's almost a month period for her to ask about me, but why she want to choose this period? This caused me to think that she just want to ask me just to made me tell her my results unintentionally. That's actually what happened last semester. She only finds me when the exam results are released and that time, I'm so silly to trust that she cares about me that I told her my CAP, which is now I deeply regretted now.

Sorry if you think that I thought too much, but I really don't know lo...If you really care about me, then you can find me anytime to ask and not only during that period right? I'm not silly. You said that I seemed to be that I'm not willing to open up to you, but you've never asked me anything too.

Sorry to say that I find no trust in anyone because of my past experiences and betrayals...People betrayed my trust everytime, how can I ever learn to believe in humans anymore? Sometimes, I really wished that I can find someone I can talk to, someone to listen, someone to....nevermind, I'd better stop dreaming. I won't be able to find anyone to share all these things I wanted to do together...Shut my mind up. Close my heart. Then no one would be able to come in. Don't convince me into relationships, cause I'm afraid that I'd want more...And sorry to say that I don't dare to trust guys much....Guys cheat on girl's feeling...People became lesbians because of past relationships. But I can't find myself wanting to be a lesbian, because I know that I like guys and I'm straight. But I just find it hard to find a trusted guy that I wanted to be with again...That's why I think I should remain being single till I found one that is like...Ou Chen :)

Summer's Desire...

I've finished watching this Taiwanese drama acted by Barbie Hsu and Peter Ho. I fell in love with Peter Ho now...Oh well, maybe it's because of his Ou Chen's character that I actually like...But Peter Ho acted well, so, hmm...thumbs up for him and I've liked him too:) I love all the songs in this drama that I wanted to find for the music sheets (piano) but to no avail...Sigh...Instead I've found their "wedding pictures"...



I REALLY WISH THAT I CAN FIND THE PIANO SHEETS AND LEARN THEM :(

Summer's Desire ost: Mask (piano)

i fell in love with this song...<3

Summer's Desire MV ~ I Don't Feel The Same

I'm in love..with him...and this drama

A Thought of Getting a Third Part time job

Seriously, I've thought of getting myself a 3rd job. But, I just wanted to work for only once per week for the 3rd job. Initially I never thought that it is possible to get such job. Cause who wants to let you work when you only wanted to work a day in a week?

I went to meet up with Prof Leong because she told me that she has a friend who wants to donate her Nutrition book. Initially she did posted on FB who wants the used books that she don't need it and I was so late to reply that all the books are already "booked" by others...However, Dr Leong messaged me telling me about it and asked me if I wanted it. So I just said yeah and arranged to meet her today after work.

It's still a new book ler...Published in the year 2009. And it's still clean and nice. :)  Prof Leong then asked me about my job and I told her that I worked at Dome for $5.50/hour. She said that the pay was damn low. Yeah, I know. But I'm okay with it actually. New experience. People at there treat me nice. Can learn to make coffee. First time working as a cashier. So yeah, it's a new experience! And yeah, free transport too since I was sent to UCC which is just in NUS. So, I can take the internal shuttle bus to UCC. Hohoho~

Then, Dr Leong talked to me about a job being a domestic helper that can get pay about $10/hour. My eyes opened so big and I was like "wow~!!" ...LOL @myself. And the job just include some simple cleaning but mostly ironing. Cool ler...Iron clothes also get quite high pay. Of course I don't mind for that kind of job. And as long as I can get myself more money, why not? Hmm...so, I'll look around Kent Vale (prof Leong told me most lecturers stayed there...zZzz...and I've never knew anything about it! LOL) and see if the lecturers need anyone to iron their clothes bo?? Hehehehe *evil grin*  And simple cleaning jobs is fine with me ba~!!! :P:P:P

你不觉得你的人生是很可惜吗？
你是注定要独自生活...
你没有任何真正的朋友在你身边... ...
你只能通过自己单独看电影...
你所谓的朋友在哪里?
你有没有被爱过吗？
将会没有人在你身边...
你是这样的一种悲哀！

Jang Nara if you ask me to

I am Darn Bored :(

Today was an off day for me. Yeah, a rest finally. Hahaha. But I'm freaking pissed that someone stole my knife and my chopping board. Darn it. I'm so pissed that I wrote a notice and paste it on the fridge: "Hello? To that person who stole my knife and chopping board, can you please return them to me? I am not doing a charity here, so stop being a thief and please buy it for your own, ok?" I'm so angry that it spoiled my mood to make salad today. Stupid brainless people, I'm already really kind for not using harsh words at that person ...>.<

Ugggh....And this morning I went to Emicakes with Jun. The cake prices are only about $2++...Damn cheap right? As long as the cake prices are below $6. Pine Garden also. I saw it on a newspaper about the cake shops that sold below $6 for a slice of cake...Cool right? Damn cheap! I bought a Durian crepe ( taste fab!), and tiramisu...Damn nice!~!! And Jun bought Oreomisu...LOL~~It's not bad...Worth, cheap and tasty...:)

Sigh, I'm freaking bored now. I felt like borrowing books from Clementi Public Library...but I don't have any cards to borrow...I wanna borrow those recipe books, those nutrition-related books and so on...:(

17 Tips to Ace Your Next Phone Interview

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Andrew G. Rosen, On Tuesday 14 June 2011, 21:40 SGT

It's easy to understate the importance of a phone interview, dismissing it as merely the first step in the long job-search process. In reality, a seemingly cursory phone interview is actually the most important step, because without success, the next steps never happen.
Follow these phone interview tips and make it your business to secure a face-to-face meeting:
1. Print it out. Have a physical copy of your resume and the job description in front of you during the call. Type up a bulleted list of items you want to cover during the conversation. As each one gets satisfied, cross it off the list. Printouts are necessary in case your Internet access fails.
[See 9 Companies Hiring Now.]
2. Have Web access. It's always best to give your full concentration to the interview, listening and answering questions diligently. However, also take advantage of the fact that the interviewer can't see you. Open up the company's website in your browser and have another window open to the search engine of your choice. But be sure to never let the interviewer hear you typing. Invest in a quiet keyboard or practice the art of silent typing.
3. Disable extra phone features. Whether it's call waiting or an answering machine for an additional phone line, turn off all your phone accessories. These noises can be a distraction and embarrassment, sabotaging your chances of moving the interview process forward. Most phone companies let you disable and re-activate these features on a self-service basis.
4. Use a landline. Don't allow outside noises or a choppy cell signal keep you from an awesome opportunity. Making the call from a landline leaves less room for misinterpretation and cuts the odds of disconnection to a minimum. Also be sure to use a high-quality phone. Every phone makes your voice sound different; too much treble and you might sound weak, too much bass and you could sound self-important. Find the phone that suits your voice best.
5. Make the call from home. It's important to make the call in an environment with minimal noise and where you can speak at a reasonable volume. The more controlled the space you're calling from, the less room for distractions and other unanticipated events.
6. Give yourself time. Many job seekers make the mistake of trying to fit a phone interview during their lunch hour at work. But what if the interviewer is running a few minutes late? Also, the longer the call, the better you're doing! Make the call at a time where you have a minimum of 30 minutes free. Most phone interviews last only a few minutes, but if you end up hitting it off with the interviewer, the last thing you want to do is have to cut them off. Even if you're interviewing for a low-stress job, rushing will increase stress, so give yourself plenty of time.
[See The Best Way to Take Control of Your Job Hunt.]
7. No pets allowed. If you conduct the phone interview from home, do it in a pet-free room. Make sure your cat, dog or bird is occupied and safe in another room, so barking and meowing is out of earshot. As cuddly as they might be, don't give a pet the opportunity to be a distraction during this important phone call. I've trained my cute Shiba Inu to be accustomed to being locked out of my home office. The first time I closed the door on him during a work call, he cried like a baby, but he got used to it.
8. Answer the phone with your name. To avoid an awkward start to the call, take charge by answering the phone by stating your name. This lets the person on the other line know exactly who you are and saves them the trouble of asking for you. It also helps to have a "pleasantry in your pocket" ready to go. Know exactly how you will greet the caller and start the conversation.
9. Smile. Smiling when you speak brings energy and excitement to your voice. When speaking on the phone, your voice actually loses about half of its energy during transmission. Make sure your enthusiasm gets across by overcompensating. Since no one can see you, pretend you're on a soap opera and overact.
10. Watch your body language. Everyone has different phone habits. Some people pace (guilty!) and others sit still as a statue. Find middle ground and pay attention to your interview body language. Hold your body in an upright position and don't be afraid to use your hands to be expressive. If you are the type of person who is on the move when on the phone, give yourself an enclosed area that is large enough so you avoid wondering from room to room.
11. Mute. If you need to take a sip of water or handle a situation outside of the interview, the mute button can be your best friend. On most phones, the person on the other line will never know you hit the button. However, it's always a good idea to test "mute" before the call to see if the person on the other line gets an indication that it's been activated.
12. Be honest. If a major distraction occurs during the phone interview, mention it. Your honesty will likely be appreciated; after all, the person on the other line is human too and has likely encountered a similar situation. The worst thing you can do is attempt to cover up something that takes you out of the moment, because it could make you look like you weren't paying attention.
[See How to Determine What Salary to Ask For.]
13. Be ready. Prepare all of the materials you will need for the interview and be at the location of the call at least five minutes early. The interviewer can call early; in fact, some hiring agents use this as a tactic to test candidates.
14. Convince me. You must convince the interviewer that having you come into the office for a meeting will not waste their time. Make sure that your answers during the call reiterate your experience, interest in the position, and desire to continue the conversation in person.
15. Say thanks... fast. Unlike a face-to-face interview, there's no commute afterwards. Send a thank-you note an hour or two after the phone interview. This helps you close the loop and reiterate your interest in wanting to meet the interviewer in person. The goal of a phone interview is to get a face-to-face meeting; don't be bashful about making this request. If you can't send the email right away, make several notes about the call while they're fresh in your mind. These will come in handy when you send the thank-you note later in the day.
16. Don't talk about money. Career coaches always say to hold off on discussing salary until the end of the process. But in reality, the interviewer knows you might attempt to do this and may try to force the issue. After all, determining an employee's desired salary is part of the filtering process, which is why they are conducting a phone interview in the first place. Try to keep your answer vague by telling the employer that you need a better understanding of the total compensation package until you can state your desired salary. Phrases like, "I'm negotiable," "I'd rather discuss compensation in person," or "I currently make X but am looking to make Y" can often get the interviewer to move on.
17. Always be prepared. If you're firing off resumes like cruise missiles, it is possible you'll receive an unexpected interview call. If you receive a call out of the blue, don't be afraid to tell them you need to call back. This will give you time to research the organization, research the person, and make sure you're at a suitable location for the call.
While keeping all of these tips in mind, don't lose sight of your phone interview mission: to earn an in-person meeting, convince them to love you, and get an amazing job offer.
Andrew G. Rosen is the founder and editor of Jobacle.com, a career advice blog. He is also the author of How to Quit Your Job and an established freelance blogger who is available for hire. Follow him on Twitter (@jobacle) or connect on LinkedIn.

The Meetings with the Pets

I saw an ad looking for a pet sitter last few days ago. And I called up the number to ask if they are looking for someone to take care for their pets and if they still need it. Initially the person didn't answer my call and so I sent a message last Tuesday. No one replied. So I thought that I was late for it and they don't need me for it d...So, well, it's okay. BUT....on Thursday, the lady called me and tell me some details and arrange for a meeting to meet her pets to see if I'm okay and can get along with the pets or not. So, I went yesterday morning. Though it's not the type of pet that I wanted or longed for (which is small cute dogs), but I'm perfectly fine with them as long as they are dogs. Regardless of the size. And I love dogs a lot. Besides of the 2 dogs, I have to take care of her 2 cats as well. I was surprised how their cats and dogs can stay together so well under the same roof...But, one of the dog's story was really tragedic and sad. That it made my heart sank and sad when she showed me the pictures of "her" when she found "her" in a construction site in Bangkok. Oh yeah, the owner is Vanessa and her husband is a Thai, name Will. Her dogs are named Pucky and Cow (not sure if I spelled wrongly) and the cats are Si mei and Pervous..(also not sure if it's correctly spelled) ...Cow's story was so sad when she showed me her pictures in her FB. And oh yeah, Vanessa is really kind. In fact, her pets are all those she adopted and her 2 dogs have their own sad historical stories. Vanessa told me that Pucky was beaten before by her owner and she wasn't sure who was it because she knew it after she brought the dog to the vet for scanning. Yeah, and because of that, Pucky doesn't trust people easily and may bite. And I was quite scared initially, but of course, I don't show my fear. Instead, I tried to approach Pucky but she wasn't really close to me at first. Then somehow after that, Pucky seems to hunger for my affection. She follows me everywhere and Vanessa and Will can see that she likes me so obviously. Vanessa says that she was happy that Pucky likes me despite of her "not easily believe in people" character. And I guessed that I started to like Pucky too...But sometimes, I might not like when people ask for my affection too much la...LOL...But i'm happy that Pucky likes me..:)

Oh yeah, Vanessa did say that she will only able to give me something as a sign of gratitude as she is not really able to pay by hour rate or something. But it's perfectly fine for me. I did it on my own will actually, even after she told me on the phone before. Since she's doing it a "charity", I really don't mind to help her to take care of those lovely pets lo...I know some friends said that I'm stupid for not asking them to pay me per day rate, but since I'm doing it on my own will and because I love pets alot, and if they are my friends, why can't they support me like mummy and perhaps thought of it as a training for me to be future professional pet sitter?

The Fear for Rejections

So far, I've worked for 9 days....And as I've counted, and praying that my vouchers goes alright and not be voided, my total pay would be about $630 for the 9 days of working at both Dome and the promoting Yun Nam vouchers job. Sigh...It's still not enough to pay off those stupid debts. :(   I wished my earnings would be able to land me about 1K richer after my debt payments...:(:(:(   Be positive be positive Sher Lyn!!!

Honestly, initially today I was damn emo. Emo-ed that I told Reid that I want him to accompany me to drink. zZz...Reid is a good colleague and xiao di di la...He's cute though he looks scary. Haha. He always made me laugh with his funny tricks when I emo-ed today. And I told him that he looked like Shin Chan with his thick eyebrows...Lol. That was cute u know. But he said that he don't like it. LOL...I think thick eyebrows are special and attractive to me:)   Hmm...Yeah, I thought of Reid as a younger brother nia...Cause he's younger than me by a year! Lol. And his character is so super xiao hai zi lo...Maybe when he's in front of us la...Damn cute and it made me laughed each time....

I emo-ed initially because after asking around for 5++ hours, I still haven't KD (kai dan). And I felt so super unproductive and useless and demotivated! People kept rejecting me , ignoring me, running away from me, and so on....Yes, my job is to sell a $10 voucher. But people will keep rejecting you. They're being skeptical, that's the only reason I can say. And the rejections of all people is slowly eating away your spirits and motivations, ...And Yonggie is good. He actually "gave away" 2 of his customers to me. Instead of writing his name, he wrote mine. I'm really grateful to him. And after those few hours, I still couldn't KD. And this made me even more bad. I'm afraid that what if in the end of the day I actually get 0 (despite the 2 customers Yonggie gave me)?   Somehow, I still keep on trying...I asked, and alas, about 6++pm, I got my first customer. I really going to thank her. I took time to persuade her to buy it (initially she don't want), but somehow I'm trying hard to convince her, and taada~ I got her to buy it. Thank you so much...

Then Yonggie and Reid was happy for me. I was happy. But still, not enough. Then I go and try and try to find for more customers. In the end of the day, I've got 5( I got 3 myself, and 2 from Yonggie) and Yonggie got 5 and Reid got 2. We ended at 9pm...Oh. and also thanks to the 20-year-old boy that I noticed him taking the brochure from our booth, and somehow I approached him and he bought it. And yeah, he was my last customer for today. Oh thanks thanks...:):):) Grateful....Though today's earning is only $88(because 1 voucher is invalid) in total. Just like yesterday.

p/s: I had a weird dream yesterday. I dreamed that I fell in love with a handsome and cute doctor. And he's so gentle. In the dream, somehow I fell in love with him because I had some sickness and he was so gentle and caring towards me that I fell for him. Though I can't really see his actual face, but in the dream he was handsome and cute to me....Lol...Nan dao ta shi wo de bai ma wang zhi ma???

Jang Nara Bury my face with tears Photo MV

Jang Nara - Sweet Dream

Jang Nara - Sweet Dream

What Heart Should be Made Of?

Seriously, I really hope that my heart is made of diamond and ice, and not a plain glass...So that it wouldn't be so easily shattered. People came by and broke my heart. And I have nothing to mend it. Seriously, can you mend a broken glass? Even though you may glue it and it may still look like an unbroken glass, but when you pour water in it, it will still leak...

And how long does happiness can last? When you let off your guard, your happiness will soon be lost...Well, perhaps it may not apply on you, but I'm feeling like that because usually my happiness doesn't last long before, not even a day...

Fate...?

Believe it or not, I guessed that I'm fated to be alone ...

Although it seems that I have many friends, but things seen from the surface might not be the truth...

I don't know...

I just felt that all these while I've been alone, and it's going to be the same forever...

It's like I'm fated to be the Miss Lonely...

I did my shopping alone, walked alone, eat alone, sing K alone, watch movie alone...I just couldn't find someone to go with me...It's like I'm all by myself...And no one's there to fill my emptiness...

I'm like a porcelain doll...Having two emotions at the same time...Outside I looked as if I'm a happy-go-lucky person, but inside, I'm constantly bleeding...I'm easily shattered. But appeared to be tough...Fate wants me to be alone. To be abandoned. And it wants me to accept my fate....

Working is Not an Easy Thing

First, when you work, you have to look at people's face (kan ren jia lian se): Your boss or Your customer...

As for my job, I have to look at "the customers" face...Yes, I might have good pay...But, the thing is, the customer's face. Some has grumpy look, some ignore you, some shoo you off, some listen for fun and go away after that...These are the customers that pisses me off sometimes...Well, there are kind souls that are good enough to stop by and listen and buy it from you...

Sigh, this job is mega tiring. It's not easy as what you may think though it sounds easy. And that's what I thought too at first. Sell a $10 voucher only ma, so easy. But when I first started it, I realised it was a wrong thought. Totally wrong. Ultimately wrong. Selling these vouchers is not easy. It's been my 3rd day working as a roadshow promoter d, and the most I sold is only 6 (2 invalids). And my 2nd day I sold off 3 and today, 4. Well, Yong Xiong was freaking cool and amazing. The most he sold before is 17. But my friend told me that was a luck cause that day was a public holiday...Okay. So, I see. Well, 1st day earning is about $130, 2nd day only $81 and today is only about $110. It's still not enough to pay off my stupid debts. I really regret to be involve in MLM thing lo...I shouldn't involve myself in it. Sigh...

And my leg is mega tired now. There was a couple of times that I felt like fainting. But I am trying hard to resist myself from it. I felt that my body is getting weaker. These days I always have the feeling of mild faint...I really don't hope that I will faint and no bai ma wang zhi save me...zZz...See? I'm still so tian zhen hor? Sigh...Really mei de qiu le la....>.<

Oh yeah, bought these cutie stuff for sushi and bento set stuff...Might need to buy some whole grain rice to make sushi tomorrow and try the stuff out..:)

Womanizer

If you think I'm a flirty type of girl, yes, you may be right, but no, you may be wrong as well. It depends on my mood.

But, of course, I'm not the one who reveals my true self on the first meeting. Yesterday, met another 2 new colleagues. James and Reid. Initially I doesn't really like James. But...after some time of communication, I'm okay with him.

Maybe he doesn't like me as well initially, cause I'm a Msian. And the reason I don't like him is because he said that because of us Malaysian so many flooded in their country, they have lesser place in the university placement and etc...That's the ultimate reason that I hated him initially for that. But then, after a few hours, he treated me quite okay...Slowly, my anger towards him also faded a lil. But what I really wanted to tell him is, it's not that we want to snatch their places in the university...But we chose Spore is because we trust their way of education and the qualities as well as the safety to be in this country...I really wanted to ask if he really hated us. I know that there are some Sporeans that hated foreigners like us for snatching their jobs and etc. But, why must they put the blame on us? We are also trying for survivals. Everyone has the right to find a place to work and to choose where they wanted to work as long as they respect the people in that country.

Anyway, I didn't ask him also la...I guessed I'd ask him one day if I meet him again if he really hates me for being in his country...If you want to say that I'm naive, go on. I don't mind. I know some readers criticize me of my foolishness or something. Well, I don't mind! I am learning not to care what others say about me. And if  I am to criticize you back, that makes no difference between you and me.

Anyway, Betty nagged him for trying to flirt with me...I might knew it, but I acted nothing. Cause I never want to ask. Yes, James did treat me quite good after a few hours later. But I can see that he's also a flirty type of person. Like Alvin. So, for what I'm wasting my time on both of them? They might treat me good just to play around with me, but I'm aint that silly either to think that they like me. It doesn't make a big deal anyway...

Oh yeah, I'm quite happy that I'd be jie's bridesmaid when she's getting married next year...Excited...So, is that why I'm looking at wedding mag nowadays?? :P

People I met in Life...

I've never knew that when you work, you'd get to meet people from all walks of life...
Just like my job as a roadshow promoter, I met 3 different people at once...
First, I met a guy who has hairy chest. Sounds funny? I laughed when I told mum, and mum said that I'm being mean and bad for laughing at people. Haha. Okay, I really did try to stop myself from laughing ok? It's just that when I met such people, I recalled what my sister joked with me about before. It's really funny. If it wasn't for sis's joke bout it, I wouldn't even find it funny.
Second, I FOUND A GAY! Oh oh oh...Perhaps people said that homosexuality is common in Spore. But throughout my almost 1-year stay in Spore, I've never met any gay or lesbian friend before. Haha. But too bad, my new gay friend isn't really cute looking as I've always wanted...
Third, another colleague of mine is a lesbian. Wow, don't you think I met 3 different people in just a day? And they're my colleagues...

Working as a roadshow promoter at here really enlarge my social skills. At first, I thought that I'm freaking shy. But, when you're working outside, you really have to socialize with people. So, I actually did talk to them most of the times...

At Dome, which is actually my first job ( since i'm having 2 jobs at the moment), working there as a service crew is also quite nice. Nelson is quite ok, but sometimes he's a bit mean...Just like when I asked him if he heard a girl singing in the toilet yesterday, he said "Yeah and I asked her to shut up"...zZzz...I met the girl in the toilet actually and heard her singing...I think she's really pretty and friendly...And her singing is great...But Nelson is so mean to say that she sings as if she's crying...and make fun of the girl...(even though they never met la...)  Sigh...
And Amy, she's actually 30 but looks like 25...Super cute and good. I really like her lo...She's really good and down-to-earth...In fact, she's my boss ex-classmates...Cool right? Haha...I asked her why didn't get herself a bf yet and she and my boss just laughed at me...And I don't even know why...:(

And last Friday when I first worked at Suntec as the roadshow promoter, I was back to Buona Vista station to get a bus back to my hostel...A guy asked me if I was going to take bus 95 (since the last bus is 11.57pm). I replied yes. I don't remember how we ended up chatting even though we don't know each other. The bus reached, I thought that our conversation will end. So, I don't really bother about it and get into the bus lo...Unexpectedly, he sat beside me...Then we talk again lo...So that the atmosphere won't be so awkward. Then upon reaching Science fac, he insisted to walk me home. (Yes, taking bus 95 doesn't really direct me back to my hostel. Have to walk for about 15 minutes to go back to my hostel) I declined his offer since he actually stayed at Raffles Hall and it's not really near from my hostel. If he were to walk back to Raffles, it might took him about half an hour...But he said it's okay, NUS is not that big. I didn't give him an answer, but he just tapped his card and go out with me. I appreciate his company to walk me home at this late hour, but I felt bad at the same time when he had to go back by himself...It's already 12am++ that time...So late...He's being sweet even though we don't really know each other...:)

But but but...I really don't understand why I kept attracting the wrong guys lo...I received a message from Alvin just now(yes, the hairy chest guy), asking me to tell him Good night, handsome. Of course I didn't add the last word. Then, he asked me why I can forget the magic word...-.-''  Ugh...I'm tired. People I liked likes others, people that I don't like, likes me. I'm tired of attracting the wrong person when I don't even try to attract them at all...

Sometimes love is not the most important thing in life...

Barbie Hsu Pao Mo Mei Run Yu Summer's Desire OST

Jealousy

Jealousy is a kind of fear....The fear of losing you...

Happiness and Sadness

Yesterday was my first job in UCC Dome. Initially I thought that the people there are cool cool dei and as a newcomer, I don't even dare to talk to them. Cause I'm too shy to start the move. But somehow, I really can't stand seeing them get along so well, and I really want to be in it too. So, I gained much courage to start talking to the girl, Amy. Fuh...Lucky me. She was really good and friendly. We talked a lot. And guess what? Without knowing her actual age, you'd think that she's a student or maybe a graduate. But...know what? She's actually 30! 30! OMG...I wonder how she remain looking young...So cool...And lucky that she's like me...HAha...But I really wonder if I really expect things too much from myself? It's my first day of work, but I'm not satisfied with my skills. I am supposed to be the cashier today. So I learnt how to use the machine. But this machine is more "fu zha" than those I saw in the shopping malls and etc. It got lots of button and when people came, I got so nervous and when I am nervous, I can't really find those buttons to press...zZZz...Then I asked Nelson which button to press. Nelson showed me. I guessed the customer thought that the way Nelson and I communicate is too formal, but with Amy, it's like they're couples...HAha...That's what I thought of them initially. It's funny. Then, you know what the customer said to Nelson? He said, " You two should find some days to go out together and have a lunch or dinner after work to know more about each other...You two seems like no chemistry at all.." Then I was like...just smiled...Cause I don't know how to react. But luckily Nelson said that it's my first day working here today. Lol..After that, since there's no much customers, we're quite slack la...HAHAHA! So, the four of us slack outside (got air-cond)...Then we chat and chat...HAhaaha!! Then, they asked me to follow Nelson to throw the rubbish..Just to let me know where to dump the rubbish...So, I followed him. Then he told me that usually he'll be doing this job, but it's good for me to know where in case if he's not there or busy dealing with customers...Then, I just said ok...And I got talked to him also la...But I can't remember what we talked about d...
I'm quite glad that the working environment there is quite good. People are friendly. But but but, I'm just afraid that I'd be super nervous cause this coming Saturday there'll be an event in UCC, so, there'd be lotsa customers...Hmm...:(

Initially I am so happy today...But, my happiness ended when I got back home. After I checked my email. Maybe I shouldn't check it yesterday so that at least I can be happy for a day. But, sigh...I really don't know how to deal with it. But I need that scholarship so badly. How to explain it? I don't lie to them, but I don't even have a proof...:(

Mama+Lyrics Spice Girls

360 Degrees Change...

I am sad. Lonely. Bored.

I really want someone to share my feelings with...but just couldnt find the right person. I also wanted to be loved and pampered. But ...am to afraid to commit in a relationship. I see couples everywhere, I really wished I have to...But fate seems to be fooling me. It brings me happiness only for a short period of time. When I let my guard off, fate started to take everything from me, leaving me in wonder and sadness. That's why I had never ever taste happiness in my life before.

I hope to work but now it seems that I'm slacking. It's not what I wanted to. But...I still can't find a job that suits me. I hate to deal with business stuff. I guessed I don't suit to be in the business line. But, if it is related to Nutrition stuff, I'd like it...But then..after reading the Nutrition book, I realised Nutrition is all about controversies. And the best way to nutritized yourself is by consuming the food, not supplements. I am really passionate towards Nutrition-related stuff. But...sigh...I don't know. I don't even know what I'm thinking. I really don't know what exactly happened to me. It seems that I'm not myself anymore. It's like I'm totally a different person now. Last time, I used to like to talk to people and smile openly, even to strangers. But now, I seemed to be totally 360 degrees away from my old self. The new me isn't the friendly person anymore. And the new me, doesn't really like to talk to anyone, preferring to be on her own. What's wrong with me? I used to be so chatty, but now...I am so freakingly quiet, people talk to me in more than 10 words, I replied in only 1 word...People smiled to me, I looked away...What's exactly happened to me? Why am I not my old self anymore?

Sometimes, I really think it's because of my self esteem. My self esteem became so low after I came here. I have no confidence in anything. I am afraid. Honestly, I am afraid. I am afraid that ...in this world, there's no one that I can fully trust on. Not even myself that I trust. I don't even trust myself. I always doubt on myself. Where is the confidence that I once had, at least? I trust no one. I don't even trust myself. IT seems that I don't belong here in this world. I am lonely. There is no one that I can talk with. There's no one that I dare to put my trust on to tell how I am feeling. How can I trust someone when I don't even trust myself?

我不想做下去了,但必须忍受...
但我希望我可以赚更多..   :(
为什么当它在繁忙时间的，我的手机电池运行低? >.<


还有, initially 今天想去唱K, but today is weekend. And no promotion on the weekends. Sigh, that's why plan failed. 

无论以何种方式相遇， 同样都会爱上你。。。

Wah...super like this...Muahaha! I met this young and good looking manager that interviewed me. Lol. Xiao gong zhu changes from liking a guy with thick eyebrow to a working and successful guy huh? Lol. Xiao gong zhu yao qiu bu duo. Just wanna a guy that can make me felt secure with a proper career. But, also must meet xiao gong zhu's requirement geh...Cause xiao gong zhu has set higher requirement when she look for her dream guy. LOL! I don't ask much but just need a sense of security. That's the only answer to all my requirement. But, every characteristics can be categorized. And that's for you to find out cause xiao gong zhu's thinking is really different from others. 

Bad Luck =C

Yesterday somehow seems to be a bad day for me. Perhaps, it was due to bad luck. First, bus delayed from to 1.30pm. Second, the bus broke down at Lakin, and we had to take the SBS Transit bus to go to Msia kastam and then to Woodlands. Two times I have to drag the bags all alone. Third, thought that I could go back soon, but bad luck strikes again! Suddenly the officer stopped me as if I committed a crime. Wtf. He ransacked my luggage and my bag! Then asked me for the resits for the cosmetic products and the jewellery I brought back for brother's wedding. WTF! Okay. Personally, I'm the type that "bu shi de" to throw pretty boxes when the product comes in that box. So, I'll put them back nicely in the box after I used them. I really want to burst out and question them why makes them to investigate me or what? Cause it's already fuckingly late and I wanna get back home and sleep. In the end, after checking my luggages and bags, they didn't put my stuff back nicely. Wth. Somemore ask me don't worry and they will put back nicely. Put back their head better la! Didn't even put my stuff nicely and I have to repack my luggage nicely in the kastam and made me an embarassment in front of everyone! Stupid stupid stupid! And the worst is they didn't even apologise to me after making a havoc to my luggage without a valid reason. Damn you officer! This is the first time I encounter this despite all along I've been taking my stuffs like that. You found nothing, yet you didn't apologize! Then, the next bad luck moment is at the taxi. The taxi driver told me that he don't a small change  and I had to leave my stuff and asked a stranger if he had smaller change. The guy said that he don't have after he checked his purse. zZzz...Then, I told him that the guy don't have. Then, he tried to find and finally told me he has it. WTH. You should check before you told me you don't have ma...And aren't they supposed to keep small changes? Really sweat dao..Argh...What an unlucky day!