Sometimes I wondered why people are desperate to increase their life span, doing all means to live longer.

For me, I often wondered since young, what's the purpose of bringing me into these world? To see how cruel is the world? To become a victim of bullies? To strengthen the bond of a family?

Why? Most of the time I felt that I'm not belonged in this world. I'm not belonged anywhere. Not in this family. Not in the society. I felt so alone.

Often people always remembered other's birthdays but seems like mine is a good date to be forgotten. Partly this is also one of the reasons I don't think my birthday is special because there's nothing special I could ever remember of.

My father was telling me all sorts of ways he learned from the internet on how to live longer like brushing your teeth every time after a meal,

I don't even bother to listen to that although I heard him telling me. I just think that my life is so uninteresting and everyday is such a dull and boring day for me that I got so bored that I don't even care if I had a short life. So what if I die young? Everyday of my life is just another repetition of everyday's routine and I can't even find any interest in anything. I got so bored of life. So why do I even bother to do things to extend my life? After all, your life and death is destined by God.

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