Seeing how good their relationships are...to say the least, I'm a lil jealous. Initially, the 5 of us has good relationship before we came to NUS...We talked so much things together on FB...But things changed after the 5 of us came to NUS. A seems that she doesn't like me. But we did talked. Not much though. Then, T, K, J and me has good relationships that even MSL people thought we are inseparable...But after we're separated into our respective groups, things started to change, slightly.

But now, when I see the 4 of them having good outings together on each other's FB wall, I hope that I can be in it too. Well, the separation caused is not the factor actually. So, no worries. I just don't know why. But nevermind. I'm lazy to seek for the answers. It's as if there's no need to find for the answers too.

There is someone who seems to care about me. She kept asking about me. But sometimes, maybe the problem did lies in me. I really don't know if someone really genuinely cares for me or what she wanted to know is my results? You know, people like to care about you only at this period (only right after exam results are released). Is it that I think too much? But why she finds and care about me only after the exam results are released? There's almost a month period for her to ask about me, but why she want to choose this period? This caused me to think that she just want to ask me just to made me tell her my results unintentionally. That's actually what happened last semester. She only finds me when the exam results are released and that time, I'm so silly to trust that she cares about me that I told her my CAP, which is now I deeply regretted now.

Sorry if you think that I thought too much, but I really don't know lo...If you really care about me, then you can find me anytime to ask and not only during that period right? I'm not silly. You said that I seemed to be that I'm not willing to open up to you, but you've never asked me anything too.

Sorry to say that I find no trust in anyone because of my past experiences and betrayals...People betrayed my trust everytime, how can I ever learn to believe in humans anymore? Sometimes, I really wished that I can find someone I can talk to, someone to listen, someone to....nevermind, I'd better stop dreaming. I won't be able to find anyone to share all these things I wanted to do together...Shut my mind up. Close my heart. Then no one would be able to come in. Don't convince me into relationships, cause I'm afraid that I'd want more...And sorry to say that I don't dare to trust guys much....Guys cheat on girl's feeling...People became lesbians because of past relationships. But I can't find myself wanting to be a lesbian, because I know that I like guys and I'm straight. But I just find it hard to find a trusted guy that I wanted to be with again...That's why I think I should remain being single till I found one that is like...Ou Chen :)