what would you do?

The pain is so intense, actually.
But I often acted like a normal person...
It's like there's this thing, it felt like a lump...it's like I had that for the past 4-5 days. I thought it was nothing although, it caused me a slight pain...but now as days passed,the pain was really unbearable... it seems that the lump is getting bigger? I don't know, I never go and try to touch it before that until just now when I found the pain is hardly bearable. It seems like a 20 cents coin size.

But seriously, I'm really afraid of pain. I know if you're my friends or family, you'd ask me to go for a check up. But the doctors always doesn't seem to know how pain it is,and when they touch that lump,they will want to press it. And here comes the fucking pain! Even without touching it ,seriously it's already torturing me. What if the pain is at the sensitive part? T_T

Next thing is, I'm afraid that all of sudden I have cancer or tumour or whatever. Gosh,.I know I am too imaginative. But my aunt just developed breast cancer, and it also means that I would have the risk. Then I don't know what sort of cancer I'll be risked at....:(

I really afraid. But I am afraid of going to the hospital... should I wait for a few days more to see if that growth subsided?

There could be other reasons? Like, I didn't drink enough water, that's why I have this growth...? Since my body is sensitive to lack of water.... haiz... how how how? Move around also pain...;(

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